♥ J-Mie ♥ [jamie0907.blogspot.com]

w h i t e THIS IS PRIVATE.

Music Playlist at MixPod.com

Navigate the alphabet. There's no comment box so leave ur msg in tagboard. =)

You never understand,
What's in my heart.

** **

Friday, February 24, 2012 written @ 12:35 AM

To : 自己

"当你觉得希望出现时，失望就会马上跟着来。当你觉得失望，希望又会出现。要怎么不要断断续续呢？没有希望，就没有失望。"

断断续续这么久，你究竟得到了什么？

就是无尽的失望，再失望。

或许你真的拿得起，放不下。

但是到某个时候，

你却还是在拉着自己的脸皮，

直至它破裂。

让观众看着你最丑的一面收场。

倘若今天你一点顾虑都没有，你还会不会像现在，

一直舔着每一处每一处的伤口？

他们说你很可怜，

'你好笨啊,到现在还在原地'

你难道没有可怜你自己吗？

爱到深处，则痛到深处。你明白吗？

放下吧！

为什么执著呢？

应该说，

为什么执著一个人，犹豫着他是否真心，他时时刻刻在想什么？

若放下了，

三年后，

这一切，

将不再重要！

当他问你，

你的梦想时，

他可否想过，

你的梦想，

已经为他而改变？

而他的梦想，

终究是他的梦想！

听我说，放。

** **

Wednesday, June 22, 2011 written @ 11:40 PM

I really wondering, where is the problem?

You wants freedom? You wants to play around?

Do i deserve to wait? Waiting the day you stop playing and come home?

Izzit your problem or my problem?

Why am i feeling lifeless?

I'm getting more dead hearted. The problem we have keep existing again and again. You said u wanna have a change. But did you? DID YOU?!

When do i have to believe? When not?

Too my WHY WHEN WHAT HOW WHERE in my mind!!!! I'm extremely tired now, do you know?!!! I dont wanna keep pouring my tears!

** 信任？ **

Saturday, May 7, 2011 written @ 7:55 PM

你说我对你没有那信任，

先想一想，是为什么我不给信任你。

我不能担保我再也不受伤害，

会有伤害也是因为过多的信任和期望。

我没有说那些伤害是来自你，可能是我自己的小气。

面对自己的男朋友，谁要大气？

不是我不明白，你说的我都明白，我只是不想吵下去，就是那样。

你很认真的说我是你半个老婆，我很开心。

可是今天我看到的，又让我开始质疑。

就这样，今天这样，明天那样。

我很累。

好，你要的信任，我给。

同一时间，我告诉自己，我不会再给我的期望，换来一次次的失望。

因为你说，你爱的只是你自己。

** Tossing coin... **

Sunday, January 23, 2011 written @ 11:52 PM

When there is two choices, you have no idea which to pick, then what will you do?

When you faced with two choices, simply toss a coin.
It works! not because of it settles the question for you,
but because in the moment the coin is in the air,
You suddenly realised what you hoping for.

True?
I feel it's so true.
However, i'm now lost like, even i toss a coin and i can never decide what i want.

Life's hard. but, Move forward!!

I saw some calculation from some websites, lol, a human only have 3 years left in a lifetime to achieve, what they want.
3 years, without counting you are going to marry, travel, and other stuff.

2011, what u wanna achieve?

** Conversations between us. **

Sunday, January 9, 2011 written @ 6:49 AM

Went out with him today. He's been busy working lately, i know. It's quite heartache when seeing him work hard like this.

Oh, and when he back, he's bringing me out. (Coz he's feeling bad for not accompanying me, ya know)

Okay the point comes.

Ayumi is asking, owh, nice? went out with him. How nice.
I replied : Nah. not nice. I've been breaking his ego today, for revenge =P

(Am i bad? NO I'M NOT. )

Ayumi : KNS Lah you!
Me : Who ask he did something that hurts me. So i let him try the taste back la! (Fyi, he sent a msg to the bitch, i dont know he wants to let her feel better or wat, but he just never leave her alone and reject her DIRECTLY. Telling that bitch that, he likes to pic etc etc. Add on some <3<3<3.>
Ayumi : Jeez!! he say that? WTF DAMN.
Me : So you understand how fucking sad am i. And i try not to mad at him, It's not the right timing. But i wont let him feel, he did something right thou.

Here is the story how i break his ego. We went BBQ plaza today, and we order a supreme mixed set. U know, BBQ plaza always stingy, they gave one piece of fish fillet, that small piece got pink spiral in the middle one. But tat makes me a habit, I always bite half of it, and another half I give it to him. A lil bit meaning of our love, one person one half.

Then I just bite a lil bit just now. Not even half. Lol. He started the topic.

Baby : ' You love me so few only ah? '
Me : ' Loving you too much will be suffering, you know. '

There he changed his face, suddenly down. And i continued again,

Me : ' Cannot say I love you 100%, but you only love 50%, rite? '
Baby : ' Oh i love you 50%?! '
Me : ' Wat, I'm just giving my opinion. Not you say that anything also must say out? '
Baby : ' Means you love me lesser now? '
Me : ' Oh this is private. Just like you never told me how much you do. '
Baby : ' U know, it's very hurt de lo!!! '
Me : ' 够我 hurt?! '
Baby : What happened again ar....
Me : Nope nothing, just take it as i 顶撞你 only lah. Hehehe.

Hahaha, sometimes communication can only starts there, i guess?

I just can't say it out directly, i cant. I dont want him to feel bad also.

But guys, remember the fact is, If you dont appreciate, 100% will decrease. LOLOLOLOL.

Btw, still love you much much baby. Dont hurt me kay? =P

** Disappointed **

Saturday, January 8, 2011 written @ 7:10 AM

Disappointed Disappointed Disappointed Disappointed Disappointed Disappointed Disappointed Disappointed Disappointed Disappointed Disappointed Disappointed Disappointed Disappointed Disappointed Disappointed Disappointed Disappointed Disappointed Disappointed Disappointed Disappointed Disappointed Disappointed Disappointed Disappointed Disappointed Disappointed Disappointed Disappointed Disappointed Disappointed Disappointed Disappointed Disappointed Disappointed Disappointed Disappointed Disappointed Disappointed Disappointed Disappointed Disappointed Disappointed Disappointed Disappointed Disappointed Disappointed Disappointed Disappointed Disappointed Disappointed Disappointed Disappointed Disappointed Disappointed Disappointed Disappointed Disappointed Disappointed Disappointed Disappointed Disappointed Disappointed Disappointed Disappointed Disappointed Disappointed Disappointed Disappointed Disappointed Disappointed Disappointed Disappointed Disappointed Disappointed Disappointed Disappointed Disappointed Disappointed Disappointed Disappointed Disappointed Disappointed Disappointed Disappointed Disappointed Disappointed Disappointed Disappointed Disappointed Disappointed Disappointed Disappointed Disappointed Disappointed Disappointed Disappointed Disappointed Disappointed Disappointed Disappointed Disappointed Disappointed Disappointed Disappointed Disappointed Disappointed Disappointed Disappointed Disappointed Disappointed Disappointed Disappointed Disappointed Disappointed Disappointed Disappointed Disappointed Disappointed Disappointed Disappointed Disappointed Disappointed Disappointed Disappointed Disappointed Disappointed Disappointed Disappointed Disappointed Disappointed Disappointed Disappointed Disappointed Disappointed Disappointed Disappointed Disappointed Disappointed Disappointed Disappointed Disappointed Disappointed Disappointed Disappointed Disappointed Disappointed Disappointed Disappointed Disappointed Disappointed Disappointed Disappointed Disappointed Disappointed Disappointed Disappointed Disappointed Disappointed Disappointed Disappointed Disappointed Disappointed Disappointed Disappointed Disappointed Disappointed Disappointed Disappointed Disappointed !!!!

FUCK OFF!

** Obstacles. never end. **

Sunday, December 26, 2010 written @ 7:15 PM

我们最近有很大很大的进步。

可是，为什么，要在这个时候给我们考验？

我的家人，

我说，你们是我的家人。

平时你们没有意见，为什么现在才来作声？

为什么你们要用这种眼光？

你们认为，你们有的人生经验，足以让我选择我的幸福吗？

把我绑起来是最好的措施吗？

看得见我在家一点都不开心吗？

拜托你们，可不可以做一些建设性的事。

每个人都是从零开始，你自己也不是吗！！

特别是‘你’ ！懂不懂什么是成熟的做法？

如果你从来都没有管，现在就不要做多余的事情！！那对我说只是纯粹无理取闹，做8婆而已！

自己想想，我有哪一个朋友，是喜欢你的！

如果说是拜佛，嘴巴行动举止不要太过分！不要滥用‘关心’这个字来做你的工具！！

你，能不能和我一起挨过？

我不能说，我的家人就是那么特别。

这个，我的朋友们都知道。

或许你接受不到，可是我们只需要时间。

我爱你，所以选择不告诉你。

可是我没有想到他们会给你这样的压力。

我给你的担心，却成了你的压力。我只是要和你一起分担，你可不可以不要什么都他自己背起来？想想我！

一方面我害怕你会不开心，一方面我害怕你妈妈对我的家人没有好感，一方面我害怕我家人对你有误解，一方面我不能告诉你，这就是我的家人，他们就是这样。